From the CEO – What the hell is in that briefcase?
I travel a lot. Planes, Trains, Automobiles. Plus, I’ll occasionally work from home. I hate to be without my stuff. As my briefcase got heavier, I realized I should switch to one of those Swiss Army briefcases with wheels. As I strolled into the house last night, my wife asked, “What the hell is in that briefcase of yours anyway.” Sure, I could rattle off a few things, but honestly, I didn’t know. So, I thought I’d open it up and see exactly what the heck I’ve carted around the country and world for that matter for the past years. Here’s a list, back section to front, including pockets, along with the reason I suspect I carry each item.
1) Paperwork, files, basically my current workload – no brainer, this is where the whole briefcase concept started anyway.
2) File of “Items to read” – random articles and reports, for when I have time to read. Note to self, I need to remember to read when I have time to read.
3) Laptop – duh. Need this. But I really need to get a smaller one for traveling. Have you seen those new MSI Wind computers? They have the kitchen sink included and weigh only 3 pounds and they’re small enough to use in coach (for when Gold Elite still doesn’t secure you an upgrade). Plus, they’re only $400 bucks or so.
4) Power cord - because computer batteries never last as long as they’re supposed to. I get a few hours out of mine.
5) Logitech Quickcam Webcam 9000 – because I love to see and hear my kids, friends and family from the road. I use Skype and can video conference for free. Yes, free. Cannot live without this. See http://tinyurl.com/6fl6fg
6) Canon PowerShot Digital camera – a pink one (you gotta problem with that?) – because I’m always snapping pictures and taking video at trade shows of our booth and yours truly on panels and other speaking engagements. This is a great camera. See http://tinyurl.com/56y5n7
7) Charger for the camera – because solar powered cameras are way too big.
8.) Business Cards – at least 100. Hey, I’m a sales guy.
9) Men’s leather desk valet tray – one of those nifty things you pack flat but get to a hotel and snap the corners and presto, instant place for your keys, coins, and other stuff. See http://tinyurl.com/5a6s9l
10) Ziplock with stuff – Tylenol, mouthwash from the last hotel I was in, toothpaste, toothbrush, Zicam, Airborne, Listerine strips (like I said, I’m in sales), Imodium (hey, you never know) and Purell (because I’m a germaphobe).
11) Blow up neck pillow for flights (again, because Elite Gold only gets you upgraded on short flights where you don’t have time to get a sore neck.)
12) Continental Airlines earphones - from my last flight - in case I forget to bring my noise-cancelling headphones. They have guts calling these “state-of-the-art” but okay, not bad for a buck.
13) Checkbook – not sure why I need this but where else would you put it?
14) Folded leather frame with pictures of my family. I unpack this as soon as I check into a hotel and put it by the bed. Awwww. Note to self, put new pictures in the frame… they don’t look like that anymore, plus you’ve had another child since then.
15) Emergency phone charger with AA batteries. This looked like a great idea at the store. But I haven’t needed it yet. Better keep it in there though because as soon as I take it out, I’m going to need it.
16) Travel Wallet with all my passport, frequent flier, rewards, hotel, car rental Gold Club, President’s Club cards including my new FlyClear card to whisk me through Orlando airport (I used to go there a lot and can’t wait until they install this in terminal “C” at EWR). Also included in this wallet are Continental drink coupons that I don’t use because I don’t drink on the plane. Hmmm. Times are rough, so can you say stocking stuffer?
17) Hand lotion – from the last hotel I was in. It says “Lowes” but I don’t remember staying at a Lowes. Isn’t Lowes a movie theatre? I wonder who put that in there? Sage and Thyme Infusion..mmm.. I’ll keep it.
18) Receipts from my last trip – okay, from my last four trips. I really need to fill out an expense report.
19) Pens. Blue and red. – I carry a really nice pen, I always have. The one I carry now I got as a gift for being a best-man at my friend’s wedding. I hate when non-pen people (who can’t own a pen because they lose or break them) ask to borrow your pen. I give them a cheap one and tell them to keep it. It’s like those people who don’t wear a watch. What’s up with that? Really? You don’t ever need to be someplace at a particular time? Ever? And then, they ask you what time it is. I always tell them it’s an hour later than it really is, just for the fun of it.
20) My nameplate from my last office at my last job. Hmmmm. I was wondering where that went. Well, if I lose my briefcase, whoever finds it will know who it belongs to. Really, this is a keeper.
21) Notepad – last entry – Robert Graham Shirt Style #R508129 – I love this shirt. I have to order one. See http://tinyurl.com/6ggf8z
22) Mini-calculator – I carry two blackberry devices – I think I can lose this. See? I’m making progress.
23) Blackberry charger – Critical.
24) Blackberry / computer cable – I used this once to restore my address file while I was traveling. Hey, it could happen again.
25) Camera USB cable – to download pictures to my computer. I really have to do that someday.
26) Computer internet cable – my machine has wireless. I can lose this. But I’ll keep it in my desk in case I ever think I may need it.
27) Pocket note card holder – for trade shows – a great place to take notes. You need one of these. See http://tinyurl.com/6m4fkc
28) Extra office keys. I forget my keys at home sometimes.
29) Collar stays – three of them. That’s either one too many or one too few. I can lose one and that lightens the load even more.
30) Okay, ready? Extra boxers and tee-shirt. Hey, you ever get stuck at some airport for a night? No? Trust me. If you do, sit next to me, I’ll be the guy who doesn’t smell like he just came from the gym. I’ll be germ-free, well-lotioned, headache-free, well read, connected to the internet, able to Skype you with your family, able to help you check your email, able to take some pictures of the overnight ordeal, take down notes, show you old pictures of my family, sell you on Tripology, buy you a drink AND lend you a pen you can even keep. Stick with me, we’ll go places.


